British Hygiene

Just when you thought Britain had joined the modern world, what with mobile phones everywhere and digital TV and other technological advances, the Britain of old comes through: On ‘Fat Nation’ -a weird, feature-length public health message telling Britain to lose weight on TV- they were demonstrating toning exercises one can do in the bathtub. Ok. Then the presenter says “Since everyone takes a bath at least once a week…”. Oooooh-kay! And knowing the precarious state of British showers, we all know that weekly bath is the only time people are getting clean. Similarly, my washing machine has a setting called "worn once". What does that mean? Less soap and water? There is the perennial European fear of drying out your skin by washing too much, but does that apply to clothes as well?

Reminds me of that Mike Myers skit on Saturday Night Live of the British commercial advertising toothpaste containing 75% sugar. I’m just waiting for the day when they figure out that it makes sense to have hot and cold water running out of one faucet so you don’t have to make a choice between getting scalded or frozen to death when washing your hands.

While we’re on the topic of helpful tips: In today’s police report published in the weekly paper, there was the story of a young man who was arrested on the streets of Stornoway while walking around town at 3:30 am carrying about 50 hits of E and 390 pounds in his pocket. Here’s my thinking: it’s probably not a good idea to be walking down the street in Stornoway at 3:30 am –that in and of itself is highly suspicious.

Ok, enough with the snarky comments. I don’t know what’s gotten into me.

I think it may be time to get one of those sunlamps. Once we change back from Daylight Savings tomorrow, it’ll be dark by 6 pm, and if the weather continues as it has been recently, it won’t really matter whether it’s light or dark outside because I’ll be spending my life inside.